February 7, 2017

Stop the "MOM SHAMING" yo.

Ever since becoming a mother myself is only when I saw this crazy topic come to light, and I wondered if anyone else had seen it as well, or what those moms thoughts were on it. I feel like moms are always on the defense or on the attack for the way they go about parenting, their own upbringing, or whether they work or stay at home, and how that somehow defines or determines you a better or more qualified mother. 
I have been blessed to be a stay at home mom.
both to one baby, and a time where I stayed home with both Henry and Jett. 
I also have been a working mother.
both to one baby, and now currently with both Henry and Jett.
In NO way shape or form have I ever thought either one of those has make me "better" than any other mother.
That's just ridiculous.
There is so much joy and also so much compromise to each of those, that you just couldn't possibly rank one higher than the other. 
I've heard those silly opinions left and right.
Some blatantly, and some just with attitude and tone.
"Stay-at-home moms just get to nap, shop, and do whatever they want"
"Working moms don't have as much patience because they're tired from their work day."
BLAH BLAH BLAH.
Seriously?? That needs to STOP.
We as women, and especially as mothers need to unite and equip each other in these trenches of motherhood together. 
If you get anything out of this post, I want you to see that if you are a mother, you are a GOOD ONE. 
Are you a mom who's breastfeeding? Way to go! It really is an amazing gift to give your baby, for any amount of time that you can manage. YOU ARE A GOOD MOM.
Are you a mom who's formula feeding? Isn't science amazing? To think there was a time when a baby with a mother who couldn't produce enough would suffer, but now is well nourished? YOU ARE A GOOD MOM.
Are you a mom who does cloth diapering? Fluffy bums are the cutest, and so friendly on the wallet! YOU ARE A GOOD MOM.
Are you a mom who buys disposable diapers? Dang those things hold a lot, and it's excellend to not worry about leakage or laundry. YOU ARE A GOOD MOM.
Are you a stay at home mom? It isn't easy doing what you do, but to spend those precious years with your babies must be amazing. YOU ARE A GOOD MOM.
Are you a working mom or going to school? It's wonderful you are sticking to your career and schooling, you're a positive role model for your children in so many ways. YOU ARE A GOOD MOM.
To the mom who had to feed her kids from the drive thru all week because you're too worn out to cook or go grocery shopping, or were slammed with errands all day, you are feeding your kids, and hey, I bet they aren't complaining! Sometimes sanity can indeed be found in a Happy Meal. YOU ARE A GOOD MOM.
To the mom who gave her kids a homecooked breakfast, lunch, and dinner for the past week, Excellent! Good nutrition is important, and they're learning to enjoy healthy foods at an early age. YOU ARE A GOOD MOM.
To the mom with the kids sitting quietly and using their manners in the fancy restaurant, kudos mama! It takes a lot to maintain order with children in a place where they can't run around. YOU ARE A GOOD MOM.
To the mom with a toddler having a meltdown in the cereal aisle, with a cart full of kids being siblings and picking at each other, they always seem to pick the most embarrassing places to lose their minds, don't they?! We've all been through it. YOU ARE A GOOD MOM. 
To the moms who judge other moms for for ANY of the above? You might need to check yourself.
Moms now more than ever need the support and encouragement from mom's of all walks and backgrounds. 
So when you see the "tired mom" wandering Target, smile at her, maybe she's lonely and worn down from parenting.
Mom's need to support in the lows and praises alongside in the successes.
Are you with me?
XOXO KESS


January 12, 2017

one word.

umm hi 2017!
i seriously cannot believe its here already. 
i feel like for so many people the new year gives them a sense of opportunity.
new visions.
new inner strength.
new optimism.
new chapter.
new sense of hope.
for the most part those have been the feelings i've experienced every time.
except this year.
i don't know if it was the rush of Christmastime and Henry's birthday, 
traveling from family to family,
and then the rush home to a busy work schedule or what,
but honestly, i haven't really felt any of those things.
in fact, i don't really think i've processed or let a new year sink in at all.
for some reason i've felt those post-season blues,
a overwhelmed, unsettled spirit.
almost in a way this new year seems somewhat daunting.
"oh, another year i will disappoint myself by not following through on the exercises i want to do"
"i have so much to organize and go through to simplify my home but i don't know where to start"
"another chance at trying to find time and money for all the hobbies and skills i want to have"
maybe i seem like a negative nancy, but please tell me i'm not the only one.

so last year, instead of coming up with grand resolutions, 
i've been going along with the "one word" resolution idea, and i really love it.
last year i prayed long and hard about my word for 2016.
god put it on my heart.
CONNECT.
it was a year of trying to build relationships, 
reaching out to people in ways i never had.
well this year i've been praying for my word.
one day while driving home from the store with the boys it hit me,
hit me hard.
INTENTIONAL.
i knew right when it hit me that was my word.
and it's stuck with me since!
I remember getting home and putting the groceries away,
I build a cardboard box castle and got down on the floor with the boys to play,
i left my phone on the counter for hours,
i wrote a couple cards to mail out,
the next day i left my waitress randomly $20. 
I want to be more intentional in the moments around me.
i want to live with a more purposeful intent.

have you heard of the one word resolution?
are you doing it yourself?
if not its really easy to start and try out.
i'd love to hear what your word is :)
happy 2017.

xoxo KESS